New ways to bear this load, in strengthened faith and resolve, keep me in forward motion. Memories of a life once had are just over my shoulder, begging a backward glance...a life that could have been, a life not meant to be. Though deep and happy, my spirit is strained.
The struggle never ceases but at the same time, neither do the consolations...
(I came across this quote yesterday)
"Bear the cross but do not make the cross bear you."
Last weekend, I made my annual trek to the resting place of my dear, late husband, Chris. He has been buried at the top of the hill, under that beautiful evergreen tree at Calvary Cemetery, for many years now. Still, it never ceases to amaze me that we buried him on top of Calvary Hill after his tragic death on Good Friday.
It wasn't my plan.
Without a doubt, God had this all in mind.
He must have known.
He must have known I'd bring my memories, my sadness, my loss, one foot in front of the other, uniting one Good Friday with another.
He must have known that I'd find beauty in the fields of gold...Peace in the whisper of the hilltop winds.
He must have known that the seeds of forgiveness would brightly bloom, beginning right here.
He must have known where there was hatred, there would be love...
Where there was darkness, there would be light,
Where there was doubt, there would be faith.
He must have known that climbing the hill to Calvary would heal the brokenhearted.
He must have known that one Good Friday after another, sorrow and love would mingle in a flow of life saving remedy.
The God of all grace who called you to his eternal glory through Christ Jesus will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you after you have suffered a little. To Him be dominion forever.
1 Peter 5:10-11